Blogs
Men & Feelings
Your feelings never left you... You left them. Learn how you can help your clients tune into their feelings and how you can help them go even deeper. Let me know what you think. Leave a comment below.
Off to the Races
What do you do when both partners are triggered at the same time? Here's how you can bring couples back into intimacy and relationality. Make sure you check out the Time Out Commandments that I mention in the video! Let me know what you think. Leave a comment below....
Coming Back from Infidelity Part Two: What the Involved Partner Needs to Know
Last time we talked about coming back from infidelity from the point of view of the hurt partner. If you haven't seen part one, you can watch it here. In my latest video, Coming Back from Infidelity Part Two: What the Involved Partner Needs to Know, I discuss: The two...
Coming Back from Infidelity Part One: What the Hurt Partner Needs to Know
In my latest video, Coming Back from Infidelity Part One: What the Hurt Partner Needs to Know, I discuss: The two aspects that define infidelity Infidelity as a trauma How infidelity is like grief How long the healing process typically takes Leave me a comment below...
Talking with my Father about Trauma
A skinny twenty-seven-year old, I pull a thick afghan onto my lap and ask my father to tell me about his childhood. He begins with the usual maneuvers: he adopts surliness, then he jokes, evades. By this time I am armed with the fledgling skills of a young therapist....
“The Best Men Can Be”
On January 13th, Gillette released its already famous commercial, “The Best Men Can Be,” which garnered an immediate and emphatic backlash. The commercial juxtaposed men engaging in bullying behaviors with men performing acts of decency. The nerve the ad hit is...
How to Bring a Reluctant Man Back for a Second Session
In RLT, we have seven diagnostic lenses for looking at a really precise description of what is going on and what you're going to feed back to the couple. One of the seven lenses, which in some ways is the skeleton of the whole therapy, is stance, stance, and dance. In...
Why a Class on How to Engage Men?
Let's talk about how to engage men. I'll be referring to some of my notes because this is a little technical. First of all, why am I even giving a class on how to engage men? How many of you have ever entered a lecture entitled how to engage women? Why is engaging...
Terry Real in Conversation with Thomas Hubl

Narcissism and Grandiosity
Listen to the podcast on LOVELINK Terry Real: Imagine if you woke up and one day your hand just had a life of its own. You're on the subway and your hands starts groping other people. You'd be really, really enraged at your hand because it's just not obeying...